I’ve been lying here for the past hour trying to get some sleep but to avail. I’ve been thinking about a lot of things before I go back to school, and I don’t know if that is the result of my odd work hours from school, the irregular sleep patterns of 4 hour intervals, or I’m just straight burnt. I still need to apply for another loan and readjust my schedule for this term.
Just got back from a bachelor party in Palm Springs. Man, my friends sure do think they’re getting old. Perhaps it has something to do with the amount of stress they experience from job and relationship. I’m reluctant to say that I’m kinda glad I haven’t taken to that sort of route in my life just yet, and sorta just put things on pause for a bit while I earn this undergrad. I’m fortunate enough to see a significant change in my closest of close, and the experience has been rather awakening and inspiring. Yet I’ve also witnessed how that level of determination, ambition, and drive can slowly eat away at a person. For the most part, it’s quite sad to think that some day I could end up being complacent with my lot in life thinking I’m too “old” to experience new things or enjoy the simplest of luxuries. I don’t like the thought. I feel like I’m not as close a friend as I used to be; I feel I’ve grown significantly apart in some ways from that of my old, reckless band of stomping crew. The thought of this hurts somewhat, as I’ve spent nearly half of my life knowing my lads and without a doubt, I feel like they’re a part of me and always will be.
For the most part, I was very happy to see them this weekend even if it was for a few hours of drunken debauchery with strippers.